You are quick to find fault and are critical of your mistakes and others.
A. A dangerous part of perfectionism is the mind can’t slow down and there is internal turmoil.
Academically you work hard. If you receive a grade worse then you want, you belittle yourself and dwell on it.
If you don’t succeed, you feel like a failure and tell yourself you are stupid. You re- live your mistakes in your brain.
You procrastinate for fear of failing again. Then you call yourself lazy because you procrastinated.
The pressure you place on yourself weighs you down and you still tell yourself you are not good enough.
Socially, you are afraid people will judge you if you say something wrong.
B. The Struggles with others:
If people don’t perform up to your expectations, then you deem them incompetent.
You are frustrated so you can’t trust anyone to get anything right.
You are afraid people will judge you based on them, so you aren’t a team player and try to do everything yourself.
You criticize and judge others, which causes problems for you.
If the above sounds familiar there is a risk of stress, anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts. How can you help yourself?
1. Everyone makes mistakes. Mistakes are opportunities for learning. Ask yourself, “What can I gain from this learning opportunity?” Realize mistakes are inevitable, so retraining your brain when it happens will help.
2. Accept the unique special person that is you. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. Remind yourself of your positive attributes and realize the weaknesses are ways to make you a stronger person.
3. Realize that not everyone sees the world like you. Being patient with others will help lower that anxiety and frustration.
4. Communicate you needs with others. Let people in your lives know what you want and then ask their needs and compromise. This takes a lot of practice.
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