A person's innate goal is to belong. We are social beings and want to exist with others. This desire can become extremely complicated during formative years. The stress and anxiety that comes from interacting socially, finding social groups, forming new groups, and losing groups, is quite overwhelming. This is a natural rite of passage. So how do we minimize our reaction and anxiety over social groups?

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1. Be who you are! You will find a group to belong to as long as you are true to yourself.

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2. Try to fit in to a group most like you, versus trying to fit in a group that is far

from who you are.

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3. Ask yourself, Do these people make me confident? Do they care for me? Can I be myself? If the answer is yes you are in the right group. If the answer is no it is time to reassess and move on.

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4. When it is time to move on, look in to the why. Have they become people your values don't align with? Have they treated you badly or made you feel self conscious? It is best to leave the groups (even the "popular group") that you do not feel valued, and find the groups that do give you value.

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Tips for moving on:

1. Identify the peers that you want to interact with.

2. Involve yourself in conversation, activities, or clubs where those peers are involved.

3. Ask to go out for a lunch or grab  coffee to get to know the peers better.

4. Remember you will find your people. It will take effort and energy.

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